Life is already so complicated; let’s not make it (and productivity) harder than it needs to be
Welcome back! I hope the year is off to a good start for you. Thank you for giving me the grace to take the month of January off to focus on some other things, to rest, to think and pray and plan. I’m excited to be back in front of the microphone and looking forward to this year.
One of the things I’ve thought about a lot during the month is the ways we–I–often make life harder than it needs to be. For me, that’s manifested in worrying about things that might (or might not) happen, stewing over regrets from the past, and putting off doing things that hang over my head.
I decided I’d share with you some of my thoughts. I also did some research on what others have had to say about this, and will share some links below to other resources in case you want some ideas for ways to eliminate things you’re doing that make life and productivity harder than they need to be.
1. Procrastination
Impact:
When we put things off until the last minute, we give ourselves less time to do a good job and increase the stress of whether we’ll get it done in time and correctly, carrying it around in our head for much longer than the time it would take to just do it. This is true of important projects and small tasks, like making a phone call or running an errand. However it manifests in our lives, it simply makes life harder than it would be if . . . well, if we didn’t procrastinate.
Solution:
Develop habits of planning ahead and allowing sufficient time for important projects so that you’re not waiting until the last minute. (Same true of small tasks.)
2. Accumulation
Impact:
The more stuff we have, the harder we have to work (and the more time and money we have to spend) to maintain it, clean it, keep it organized, clean around it. This has a direct impact on productivity, as it takes time we can’t use to do other things. For example, the more clothes we (or our children) own, the more laundry we have to do. The more “stuff” we have on our counters, shelves, etc., the harder it is (and the more time it takes) to keep those counters, shelves, etc., clean. People whose space is over-cluttered also are more distracted and have a harder time concentrating and making decisions.
There’s also the mental/emotional load of clutter. WebMD article cites a study that found that women who see their homes as cluttered produce consistently high levels of cortisol (the stress hormone), while women who described their homes as well-organized and restful showed lower levels of cortisol. People with chronically high cortisol levels can experience symptoms like high blood pressure, insomnia, weight gain, fatigue, irritability, anxiety, headaches, and more.
Solution:
Be more thoughtful and intentional about the things we own. For example:
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- Use the one in, one (or two or three) out rule: Each time you buy a new item, donate, sell, or trash one.
- Cancel subscriptions for publications you don’t read, apps you never use.
- Don’t bring anything home that you don’t know exactly where you’re going to put it.
- Cultivate habits of “a place for everything and everything in its place.
- Schedule regular times for purging, such as:
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- Clothes at the change of season
- Books when you finish reading them
- Children’s toys at birthdays and Christmas?
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3. Disorganization – when belongings don’t have a designated place
Impact:
This results in lost time, energy, and attention (the three most important productivity resources) to trying to find what you need and/or work around clutter.
Solution:
Obvious: once you’ve decluttered your spaces, make sure every item left in them has a designated space and is always put there where not in use.
4. Trying to do it all yourself
Impact:
It’s easy to buy into the idea that the only way to get something done right is to do it yourself. Maybe there’s some truth to that if you’re the one with the skill and the one who actually cares about how something is done. But if you apply that to everything at home, at the office, etc., then you’re taking on a heavy load. Which of course is fine if you’re happy with it, but if you find yourself feeling stressed and resentful, it might be time to share that load.
Also, if you do everything at home you’re not teaching your children important life skills they’ll need (managing time, doing tasks well, how to do basic household tasks, responsibility for their belongings).
This approach to life is often tied to perfectionism, which is the enemy of productivity.
Solution:
Share the load. If you have an assistant or others you can delegate to at work, learn to do so. Teach your children how to do things and give them responsibility. (My oldest daughter has her teen daughters do their own laundry.) Kids can learn to clean their bathrooms, run a vacuum, even cook as they get older.
Talk to your spouse or roommate about a fair and equitable division of tasks.
When all 5 of our kids were at home, when we’d have a chore day at home, I’d make a list of every task that needed to be done, then let them (and me) take turns choosing items off the list and put their initials beside it (pick a number to determine who goes first, etc.). Then we’d all go to work, with each person crossing off their items as they completed them.
5. Comparison
Impact:
Comparison is the thief of joy. We compare our insides to someone else’s outsides, and it’s never going to turn out well. It absolutely makes it harder to enjoy our life or feel good about who we are.
Solution:
Keep an eye on your thoughts. When you find yourself comparing yourself or your life or your accomplishments to someone else, pause, and remind yourself that you don’t see the whole picture in somebody else’s life, no matter how well you know them. We can learn from others, but comparison never helps.
6. Unrealistic expectations (of yourself or others)
Impact:
We work ourselves harder (and/or feel bad about ourselves) because we’re not living up to those expectations, or we are distracted by frustration and resentment because others aren’t.
Solution:
Like so many things, the solution here is cultivating awareness and intentionality. Evaluate the things you’re expecting of yourself in light of your current circumstances. What I can do now as an empty-nester professional woman is different from what I could do when I was a much younger stay-at-home mom with 5 young kids. What you can accomplish when you are ill or recovering from surgery or childbirth is different from what you can do when you’re at the peak of health.
7. Unexamined assumptions: “We ‘need’ to do/be/have X.” Why? “My kids ‘need’ to do/be/have X in order to be happy/achieve their potential/xxx.” Do they really?
Impact:
This can result in dissatisfaction and stress when we’re trying to be, do, or have too much.
Solution:
When we find ourselves tired, stressed, or overwhelmed because there are so many things we “need” to do, pause to examine the assumptions behind them. Ask the questions Byron Katie proposes as part of the Work: Is it true? Can I absolutely know it’s true? What happens when I believe it? Who would I be without it?
8. Overcommitment – saying yes too often
Impact:
Overcommitment can result in physical and emotional exhaustion if you don’t have enough time for rest, as well as stress and resentment if your time is so full of commitments you don’t have time for the things that matter most to you.
Solution:
Practice saying no as a complete sentence and being okay with it.
Try “I’ll get back to you about that” instead of yes or maybe, and take time to think about whether it’s something that aligns with your priorities and values.
Schedule important things first–whether key appointments, time with loved ones, time for your project of the heart, or just time off–get them on your calendar so you can honestly say, “I have a conflict at that time” and offer an alternative time if it’s something you really do want to say yes to.
9. Over-saturation: Information overload–FOMO, plus things addictive by design
Impact:
Taking in too much through TV, social media, etc. leads to distraction, stress, anxiety and makes it harder to concentrate. More time spent consuming means less time available for creating or for accomplishing other things or for investing in relationships
Solution:
Be intentional about what you take in and when. Choose information sources that leave you feeling informed, calm, and hopeful rather than stressed and anxious. Limit exposure to negative inputs. Set limits around consumption–certain times each day or week; limited amounts of time
10. Inadequate tools
Impact:
No matter what the task, if our tools are inadequate, the task will be much harder than it needs to be.
Solution:
Sharpen those knives. Upgrade your computer. Educate yourself. Whatever you’re doing, try to make sure the tools you’re using (including your own mind) are in the best possible condition and well-suited to the task.
11. Neglecting your health and well-being
Impact:
Life feels harder when we don’t feel well. And it objectively is harder to show up as our best, most positive, most productive self. I like how one writer puts it: “Sure, chocolate bars are tasty and everyone enjoys a late night out once in awhile, but if you regularly ignore the basic health advice you’ve doubtlessly heard a thousand times by eating junk, sleeping a crazy schedule, or skipping exercise entirely, you are going to feel like crap. And then, yes, life will feel harder than it has to be.”
Solution:
Cultivate habits to support your health, stamina, and general well-being. Choose healthier foods most of the time. Create a good sleep routine. Move your body. Make time for restorative activities. (Warning: In undertaking these steps, don’t add pressure to be perfect–it’s not all or nothing. Anything is better than nothing!)
Closing thoughts
So those are 11 or so ways we can make it harder than it needs to be to create meaningfully productive lives. To be clear, I’m not saying you need to change these or anything in your own life. If what you’re doing works for you and you are satisfied with your own life and productivity, then keep doing what you’re doing! But if you’re feeling stressed, anxious, or dissatisfied, in one or more of these areas, and if life is feeling harder than you like, then maybe it would be worth choosing one of these to spend some time and thought on.
What do you think?
What did I miss? Is there another way you see yourself or others making life harder than it needs to be? And what are your suggestions for a solution? Post your thoughts and suggestions in the comments section below or in The Productive Woman Community Facebook group, or email me
Resources and Links
- 10 ways we’re making life harder than it needs to be | Kelly Exeter
- 8 ways you’re making life harder than it has to be
- 100 Ways You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Needs to Be – Talkspace
- 5 Mindset Mistakes That Are Making Your Life Harder Than It Has to Be | Inc.com
- 10 Ways You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Has To Be | Thought Catalog
- Ways Clutter Negatively Affects Your Health
- Beware High Levels of Cortisol, the Stress Hormone | Premier Health
- The Work of Byron Katie
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Thank you – it is nice to see ways to make our lives easier and to know we have our own backs!